What does God have for me? Is it to be an author, an engineer, or a missionary? No matter what my calling is, God has a plan for me to achieve great things. Now these great things may not be great by the world's standards or be heard of by many people, but they will be great in God's eyes. However, am I working and living towards this greatness or am I becoming contented with where I'm at or where I think I'm going?
After examining myself I find myself far too content with where I think I'm going. I have surrendered my life to God but am only letting Him work through my plans and ambitions. Now I am trying to re-orient my plans and ambitions to be in alignment with God's, but that's not good enough. That's not what God calls us to. I am to surrender my whole being to His will and His path for my life. As I was confronted with this realization at church, God asked me a single irrefutable question, "Will you surrender all?" This came in the words of a song.
You won't relent until you have it all,
My heart is yours.
You won't relent until you have it all,
My heart is yours.
Come be the fire inside of me,
Come be the flame upon my heart.
Come be the fire inside of me,
Until You and I are one
Will I lose my possessions for Him? Will I lose my comfortable middle class life for Him? Will I lose my health for Him? Will I lose my own purpose for Him? Will I even give up my life for Him(or harder yet, give my life up to Him)? If the answer to all of those is not yes, then I may as well turn away now. This is the question hH put before me and the decision I was faced with. These are His Terms of Surrender, Unconditional Surrender. This simple release of what I hold as my own and letting Him become my everything. Not an easy task and not something I took lightly. For a while I struggled within myself as to whether or not I could let go of those things I held so dear. My desire to be an author, my desire to have a family, and even my desire to live comfortably. I had to let go, turn away, or hold on to them and still attempt to follow God.
Before I even made up my mind, my God had made it up for me in the first line of the song, "You won't relent until you have it all." Even as I warred within myself He gave me a peace that, even though I knew I couldn't give up everything in my own strength, He would help lay myself down every step of the way and that the great I Am will never leave me alone. For I Am never alone.
Agreeing to Unconditional Surrender,
Joshua
I have struggled with this same issue Josh. I prayed for years that Uncle Chuck would come back to God's will and come home. Learn to forgive and reconcile his family.
ReplyDeleteToday in service, the message was giving it to God. Not just praying the same prayer every time, but truly giving the pain to God and believing He would do the work.
I realized I had been praying in my own strength for over 5 years and when I didn't see the results, I quit believing and praying without believing was useless so I quit praying.
Saturday Uncle Chuck remarried and took a previously unmarried woman as his wife making them both adulterers according to scripture and has broken my children's hearts. They all talked to him and shared scripture with him on many occasions, even quit going to his home for overnights. They believe that doing so would compromise their testimony that what he has done is Biblicly wrong.
I'm torn with whether to encourage them or discourage them in their decision. I want them to have a relationship with their father, but they don't want a relationship with this new man who doesn't act, talk or seem like their father. He has made himself into someone they don't even know. He even talks differently. Everything he ever taught them he has denied and has made excuses for.
It has finally occurred to me that I must step back, pray and give all the pain to God and let him handle it. Not give advice but just be here for them. The Lord will see them all through.
You have encouraged me so much in your journey and your transparency during your trip. Keep up the voyage and the direct connection to the great I AM. We're praying for you.
I love you Buddy.
Joshua-
ReplyDeleteI was struggling with the same thoughts yesterday. As I read that book I talked to you about, Radical, I realized again how much we are called to give up for Jesus. The cost of discipleship is great. Do we dare pay it? Or rather, do we dare not to?
Luke 9:57-62 says this:
57 As they were walking along the road, a man said to him, “I will follow you wherever you go.”
58 Jesus replied, “Foxes have dens and birds have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head.”
59 He said to another man, “Follow me.”
But he replied, “Lord, first let me go and bury my father.”
60 Jesus said to him, “Let the dead bury their own dead, but you go and proclaim the kingdom of God.”
61 Still another said, “I will follow you, Lord; but first let me go back and say goodbye to my family.”
62 Jesus replied, “No one who puts a hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God.”
Jesus says to these men that they will be homeless, someone else can bury your dad, and no, don't say goodbye to your family. Even our closest relationships will look like hate in light of what He has called us to.
Here at camp we also talk about this cost. You know that treasure hidden in a field? It's the same thing. How much of our earthly possessions are we willing to give up for that treasure? Some of them isn't enough. The Bible says he went and sold everything. Everything. (Matthew 13:44)
"When Christ calls a man, he bids him come and die." -Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Jesus relentlessly calls us to follow Him, but He is a jealous God. He doesn't want to share with anyone or anything else. Far too often we believe that he can. You cannot serve two masters (Matthew 6:24).
Thank you for sharing what is on your heart.
I'm praying for you.